Some Good Things About My Hardships

I can handle cold better than I used to.  I used to keep my heater on around 78 degrees when I had my condo.  Now I sleep comfortably (with a sweater and socks on and with a nice sleeping bag) in 50 degree weather.  Crazy.

I can eat less.  I am losing weight now because I’m tired of blowing all my money on food.  This is good.  It won’t kill me to feel hunger once in a while.

I am less afraid of people harming me.  The homeless, at least in this area are well fed and they don’t commit much crime.

One thing I REALLY need to improve on is worrying about what people think of me.  This morning I put a big bag of laundry on the handlebars of my bike and rode to the laundry mat.  Usually I put it on the back but it was kind of big and I wanted to get it DONE.  I was wearing a long, out of style coat and I was wearing pants under my skirt because I was a little cold.  I looked…hate to say it…homeless.

I don’t know why I care SO much what people think of me.  Some would say that women are wired to care more than men but I can’t remember why.  Social conformity used to be a skill needed to survive when we (Europeans, at least) lived in the frozen tundra and had to cooperate with each other if we wanted to live.  Oh yeah…women had to conform to the father of their children if she wanted him to provide for her and the children.  Now this has turned into needing the approval of Big Daddy – Society.  Honestly, I am seeing that if you don’t conform, you can’t expect much help.

I’m pretty sure some of my clients wonder if I am a free-sleeper but I guess I have built up enough trust by now that they don’t worry about it.  Maybe they like quirky people, who knows.

I hope someday I will have a success story to tell about how I got housed and successful again or something.  It would have to be on MY TERMS though to feel like a success to me.



About Maureen, Living in a Van

I'm a free-sleeper living in a van in the prettiest part of the world. I do this partly due to financial circumstances and partly because I love a good adventure.
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One Response to Some Good Things About My Hardships

  1. Ryu says:

    Women are herd creatures. They care more about the opinions of others, than their own opinion.

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