I have been the subject of a lot of gossip lately.  Part of that is because of this blog.  The thing is, this was supposed to have been an anonymous blog.  I never used my real name and I never said what city I was living in.  I DID tell The Cobra about this blog because I took a risk and trusted her.  Then she turned on me and told everyone she could think of what I had written “about them” and people got their feelings hurt.

I am truly sorry for making anyone feel bad.

I guess my blog reveals that I’m judgmental sometimes.  I suppose that’s true but if you judge me for judging, you are judging too.  I also doubt I’ve said anything you all haven’t thought anyway.

I’m judgmental of people who are messing up their lives, it’s true.  The reason is, it actually hurts my heart to see it.

Yesterday, I saw a homeless woman I met around 6 months ago.  I don’t know what’s happened to her but just a few months ago she was a very pretty lady.  She still has remarkable blue eyes but everything else in her appearance has changed.  She has gained some weight and she isn’t dressing as nice as when I first met her.  It made me sad.  At the same time I wondered if I have “gone down hill” with my looks since I became a free-sleeper.  I have definitely gained weight in the last few months.  I think I still dress okay but I have taken to wearing flip-flops a lot because of the summer heat so I’m looking a little sloppy.  Then I wonder if it even matters.

I’m going to try hard not to use the free food services for a while…or maybe use a different one that I don’t usually go to.  I really wanted to make friends with people but it’s not working out.  That hurts a little but what can I do?  Apparently, I’m not very likable.  I will still try to stay in contact with The Angel so I can pass along helpful information to everyone.

Please know that I DO care about you guys and gals.  I wish I had financial resources like The Angel and the soup kitchen folks so that I could do something to help too.  There are some people that need good jobs, for instance.  Smart people, skilled people who deserve to make more than minimum wage.  I wish I had a business where I could help homeless and other people have a second chance at a real career.  Maybe someday I will.  I’m going to try to focus more on my business so that perhaps someday I will be able to make this dream a reality.

In the meantime, please let me know if there is any useful or fun event coming up for homeless or hurting people that I should alert folks to.  Have a blessed day.

About Maureen, Living in a Van

I'm a free-sleeper living in a van in the prettiest part of the world. I do this partly due to financial circumstances and partly because I love a good adventure.
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3 Responses to Gossip

  1. Ryu says:

    I hope your ankle gets better, Maureen.

  2. B says:

    It’s normal to feel bad when people behave as though they don’t like you. But it’s also possible to try too hard to please other people.

    I used to try to please everyone. Some people liked me, some didn’t. Then I decided to please myself. Now some people like me, and some don’t. I like myself a whole lot better, and that’s what counts.

    So don’t worry about the few people who don’t like you (unless it gets to be an overwhelming pattern).

  3. Maureen says:

    Thanks you guys! 🙂

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