Faker

I feel kind of like a phony at the moment because I just started living in my van and for the last 3 nights I’ve been staying in houses!  Thursday night I stayed at T and J’s because of the blackout, Friday night I stayed at Michelle’s house because we do that from time to time and last night and tonight I’m house sitting!

It’s funny though, I’m no better rested when I stay in a bed.  In fact, for some reason my ankle was bothering me when I woke up this morning and the bed I slept on was very comfy!

Another strange (to me) thing is that this way of life isn’t for lazy people!  Darn!  😉  I still have to wash my laundry, feed myself and so on.  I still have to run errands, still have to work.  Still need to drink my water and take my supplement.  Well I suppose I could stop doing all these things but my quality of life will really go downhill if I do!

Sometimes I wonder and worry that I will slip into that way of life…you know, not washing, not working etc.  I wonder what happens to people that brings them to that point.  Drugs, depression…?  I won’t be doing drugs but I wonder if this way of life will bring on depression.  And which comes first, the chicken or the egg?  Do people get depressed because they are lazy and stop taking care of themselves or do people get lazy and depressed, and THEN stop caring for themselves?  Or is it some combination of both?

I’ve always felt that very few people are truly LAZY in the worst sense of the word.  In some instances I believe a lot of people are overfed yet malnourished.  I’ll write more soon about how this happened in my own life.  Anyway, people who are chronically unwell don’t feel like doing much.

Then there are the people who just didn’t get a good start in life and just haven’t had as many opportunities as others.  Now, I’m no bleeding heart but it’s obvious to me that there are some people who get a poor start in life.  Imagine if you grew up homeless, for instance.  Imagine you lived in a world where maybe you didn’t smell good or look good as a child.  Imagine you always had teachers and social workers “caring” for you (i.e. nosing into your business) but not really helping in any meaningful way.  Imagine as you enter your teen years not having the energy, resources or proper information to improve your situation.  Or maybe you try a couple of things and they don’t work out so you come to believe that success is for others, not you.  It happens.

Ok, I guess that’s enough pontificating for now.  I’m sure I’ll be covering this topic again.  But for now, I’ve got a to-do list to get started on!

 

 

About Maureen, Living in a Van

I'm a free-sleeper living in a van in the prettiest part of the world. I do this partly due to financial circumstances and partly because I love a good adventure.
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5 Responses to Faker

  1. Chrissy says:

    I think you are right on. It’s a devastating combo, and it’s a hard one to stay ahead of. I was pretty down a few days ago. Sometimes I feel like going homeless just to say there, that’s the worst of it now isn’t it. I know it’s not that simple, but like you I am straddling the edge so it’s a constant consideration. It is maddening always trying to figure it out. Phony is only when you’re not being you. You have your home base, and sometimes you end up sleeping elsewhere. That meets the definition of real in my book!

    • Maureen says:

      Hi Chrissy! Hmmm…well as far as being homeless, so far I don’t feel like MY “homelessness” is the worst of it. The worst of it, in my opinion, would be if I found myself without a van or car, in a freezing cold climate, without a friend in sight. Oh…and with a child to take care of. I do see your point though.

      I do believe action is generally the cure for depression so I am going to take action today so I don’t get depressed.

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